Hey all.
Just FYI, I have just finished a little (70 page) compilation of some of my writing just to tide over my public as they await my next magnum opus. (Anybody remember the "fan base" from "Flight of the Choncords"? My public is a little like that.) It's called The Tiny Confinements Miscellany and some of it is funny, or supposed to be.
The book should soon be available as an ebook on Amazon, where you will be able to check out sample pages, borrow for free etc. (though it will be priced in the range of a chocolate bar once the e-version is ready so you don't have to start saving now). In the meantime, for those who simply must have the paperback, it's out there right now if you'd like one.
Here's the link to the one place where you can order it right away if you simply can't wait.
I heart you all.
Tuesday, May 27, 2014
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
One Last Twitter Salute in Our Brief Series
To the person who did this, I salute you. pic.twitter.com/dH5GIY1D5G
— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) May 20, 2014
Saturday, May 17, 2014
I Know More Than a Few Candidates for This Place
Ross on Wye likes to keep its less interesting inhabitants in one place. Well, no one wants a wild bore on the loose! pic.twitter.com/Luz2fLR3VY
— Chippy Minton (@cherrytreechips) May 16, 2014
Saturday, May 10, 2014
OK, Point Up and LOOK MODERN
Space-age refrigeration, 1968. http://t.co/U3rbSNQ3BA pic.twitter.com/eaUT3BQmLy
— Boing Boing (@BoingBoing) May 10, 2014
I wonder if any of these models saved the helmets (or the boots and dresses or white sun/moon? glasses)? Terrible to think someone probably just threw them away eventually, once the refrigerator was launched. Friday, May 09, 2014
You Don't Have to Tweet, But it Helps
I am supposed to be writing something substantial but instead I am spending my paltry strength on Twitter.
Here's my output so far tonight.
I thought of a few more! (I sense I am boring you, but when have I let that stop me?)
Add your own fun ideas below or on Twitter! Also, I have this.
So, no slams or circles for me this weekend. Maybe a little Mother's Day hooting and hollering, though. Well. Not that either. (I neither hoot, nor holler - since I live in the north, I yell, but not this weekend since it's Mother's Day.) Bon weekend tout le monde. Happy Mother's Day to all those who are mothers, or have one, or who know one.
XOXOXOXO
PS
I was also a little proud of this one:
And while no one else liked it, I stand behind this one too (an exclusive for Game of Thrones fans).
Here's my output so far tonight.
#unpopularthemerestaurants "The Thesaurus Experience," "Planet Spelt," "Miss Ptomaine Diner"
— Kim Velk (@woolfoot) May 10, 2014
I thought of a few more! (I sense I am boring you, but when have I let that stop me?)
#unpopularthemerestaurants "Quaker Fusion", "Loose Stool Lunch Counter".
— Kim Velk (@woolfoot) May 10, 2014
#unpopularthemerestaurants "House of Math"
— Kim Velk (@woolfoot) May 10, 2014
Add your own fun ideas below or on Twitter! Also, I have this.
Sorry, but if an event name includes "circle" or "slam," I'm out.
— Kim Velk (@woolfoot) May 10, 2014
So, no slams or circles for me this weekend. Maybe a little Mother's Day hooting and hollering, though. Well. Not that either. (I neither hoot, nor holler - since I live in the north, I yell, but not this weekend since it's Mother's Day.) Bon weekend tout le monde. Happy Mother's Day to all those who are mothers, or have one, or who know one.
XOXOXOXO
PS
I was also a little proud of this one:
Drinking game for book nerds: go thru back issues of NY Review of Books & take a shot for every article by or mention of @JoyceCarolOates.
— Kim Velk (@woolfoot) May 8, 2014
And while no one else liked it, I stand behind this one too (an exclusive for Game of Thrones fans).
#GameOfThrones It could be a headline...
"NY Thruway Travel Plaza Manager in Hot Water for Ban on Patrons from North of the Wall."
— Kim Velk (@woolfoot) May 7, 2014
Tuesday, April 08, 2014
A Gift is Handed to the Headline Writers at the Guardian
Badgers should be gassed, says Princess Anne: http://t.co/QQkohqDhhr
— The Guardian (@guardian) April 4, 2014
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Shackleton, Still Speaking
My son Shackleton, who is 12, is doing the school play. Rehearsal tonight was from 6 to 7:30 PM. I was napping from 5 to 6 PM with the result that he didn't get any dinner (not from me anyway, he could have served himself but that's not happening).
Anyway, he had two things on his mind when he got home a few minute ago. 1.) Money to buy a game on-line. 2.) Dinner.
As for the money, he needs my Paypal account and he knows I will say "no" unless I get some quid pro quo: work or some other form of sacrifice. He came down the stairs shortly after arrival with a literal fistful of dollars - nine dollar bills and four quarters, to be specific.
Normally I charge him a user-fee, just to be discouraging but I was distracted by catching up with posts by my brilliant friend Lulu who got busy blogging again this winter without my noticing til tonight. I was trying to read Lulu's posts while he stood there leaking dollars. I said I would make the deal and let him take $10 if he straightened them out - they were a mess, like Oragami created by a perverse and hateful blind person. He said OK. Then I made him tricolor rotini (from a box) with meatballs (from the freezer, but beautifully thawed in the Ragu that I pulled out of the fridge). Then I got back to Lulu. (She's a gourmet so I guess I'm noticing my poor standards particularly).
Just a few posts into my reading, Shackleton was back at my desk with his (almost) empty rotini bowl. "First," he said, "one of the dollars fell into the dog water. I took it out and it's drying. Second, can the dog lick my bowl?" (She barfs sometimes).
I said yes to the bowl licking - Maisy tolerates a little red sauce quite well. And if I will eat from a bowl from which the dog has eaten, can I really object to a dollar that has been fished out of her water? Now he's gone for the night and I have eight dollar bills folded into my wallet but it looks like a lot more. I'll add the damp one tomorrow.
Anyway, he had two things on his mind when he got home a few minute ago. 1.) Money to buy a game on-line. 2.) Dinner.
As for the money, he needs my Paypal account and he knows I will say "no" unless I get some quid pro quo: work or some other form of sacrifice. He came down the stairs shortly after arrival with a literal fistful of dollars - nine dollar bills and four quarters, to be specific.
Normally I charge him a user-fee, just to be discouraging but I was distracted by catching up with posts by my brilliant friend Lulu who got busy blogging again this winter without my noticing til tonight. I was trying to read Lulu's posts while he stood there leaking dollars. I said I would make the deal and let him take $10 if he straightened them out - they were a mess, like Oragami created by a perverse and hateful blind person. He said OK. Then I made him tricolor rotini (from a box) with meatballs (from the freezer, but beautifully thawed in the Ragu that I pulled out of the fridge). Then I got back to Lulu. (She's a gourmet so I guess I'm noticing my poor standards particularly).
Just a few posts into my reading, Shackleton was back at my desk with his (almost) empty rotini bowl. "First," he said, "one of the dollars fell into the dog water. I took it out and it's drying. Second, can the dog lick my bowl?" (She barfs sometimes).
I said yes to the bowl licking - Maisy tolerates a little red sauce quite well. And if I will eat from a bowl from which the dog has eaten, can I really object to a dollar that has been fished out of her water? Now he's gone for the night and I have eight dollar bills folded into my wallet but it looks like a lot more. I'll add the damp one tomorrow.
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